Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. In this week's journal entry I'm chatting a little about trust and faith. If you desire to change careers or start your own business like I did (or maybe you're wishing to make some other big life change), there's never, ever going to be a 100% guarantee that it's going to work out. At some point, you are going to have to make the jump and trust that either (a) it'll work out the way you want or (b) it won't work out the way you want but it'll get you to the next right place you're supposed to be. It's hard to have this level of trust without some sort of faith. I talk about faith generally here and I encourage you to refer to a faith of your own understanding, whether that be in God, in the "Universe," or in some other source. And if you don't have a faith or a divine source, even more reason to read on and give it some consideration because it might be what's missing in the whole equation.

Let's back up a second. I wanted to write about this topic of trust and faith because I recently realized just how crucial it was to my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. Brief recap: I was a miserable lawyer for 11 years. I lost my father to cancer in 2017 and that experience made me realize that life is short and no amount of time is guaranteed (yeah, yeah, everyone knows this, but in my experience you don't truly understand this until you lose a parent or someone close to you before their time should really be up). You start living life differently when you truly understand that life is not guaranteed and you might not be here this time next year. So, as you might guess, this experience caused me to reevaluate my career choice and propelled me to make a huge change in the aim of finding more happiness and peace. Fast forward to 2021 and, boy, have things really changed! My jewelry business will turn 4 years old this June and is growing by leaps and bounds. When I think about my father's death now, I can't help but think how proud he would be that I used it for good. That I used that experience in a positive way. I allowed it to change me and to change my life. And I know my dad would be so proud to see me living out my dreams and living life with a deeper sense of purpose. It's as if his death gave me new life. And what better gift can a parent give his child? 

So that brings me to my main point: the absolute worst thing that I've ever experienced in my life (watching my father die from cancer in hospice care) led me to the greatest thing I've ever experienced in my life (my new career and business, and all the happiness, peace, and new people it's brought into my life).  

After that experience, it's actually hard for me to NOT trust that everything works out exactly the way it's supposed to. Phrases like "everything happens for a reason" have a deeper, more profound sense of meaning. I'm 40 years old now and, looking back, I can see why some things worked out the way I wanted and why some things didn't. The dots seem to connect in ways I couldn't see at the time. In small ways and in big ways. In all ways. And so my trust and faith in a higher power has grown tremendously. It's pretty difficult to rattle me these days because I look at even the negative experiences as divinely orchestrated. How can I not? The most negative thing that's ever happened to me led me to the most positive!

If you find yourself rolling your eyes at phrases like "everything happens for a reason" and "it'll all fall into place" and "if it's meant to be, it'll be", I don't blame you. Those words seem pretty empty and meaningless until you have a strong sense of faith and trust. And then you understand just how deep and rich with meaning these phrases are from your own first-hand experiences.

Ok, so let's get back to making a big change, whether that's changing careers, starting a business, or something else. Many people who want to make a big life change are nervous and anxious to make the leap and so they procrastinate, put it off, find excuses, and sometimes years and years go by. The fear that it might not "work out" is overpowering and they just can't seem to get past it. And justifiably so - there's fear because there is no 100% guarantee that it'll work out.

So what pushes some people across the finish line - from wishing and dreaming about a big life change to actually making it happen? To me, there's only one thing that can do that, and that's faith and trust. Faith and trust that you've been given the desire in your heart for a reason and that it won't lead you astray. Faith and trust that even if it doesn't "work out" the way you are dreaming about, the experience will ultimately teach you things, connect you to new people, and lead you to the next right opportunity. Faith and trust that the experience won't kill you (said figuratively of course, but I feel like so many people think about changing careers or starting a new business as if it's a life or death decision and it's just not! I promise you will not die if you decide to do either of those things). Faith and trust that you will figure out a way to pay your bills. Faith and trust that you will be able to figure everything out. And on and on the list goes...

If you are deeply desiring to make a big change but you just can't move from the dreaming and planning stage to the action stage, I encourage you to examine your faith and your trust in a higher power of your choosing and your own understanding. Whether that looks like meditating, praying to God, asking for guidance from a guardian angel (maybe that's a close relative in heaven you feel divinely connected to), reading the bible, returning to church, some other form of worship, or something else. Making a big change is hard and we're given no guarantees, but when we have a faith and a trust that all will be well no matter what, we find the deep courage to move forward. 

I hope this journal entry was helpful to you and made you think about life from a different perspective. If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every Monday night, click here to subscribe.

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. In this week's journal entry I want to talk about the unconscious need for approval. Are you more attached to receiving approval than pursuing happiness? I find this is a big blind spot for people in high-level positions in particular who got straight A's all their lives and went to top colleges and grad schools. It used to be a big blind spot for me. Becoming aware of this issue is one of the keys to unlocking happiness and creating a life you love.

Let's jump right in and get deep here. For me in particular, I grew up with a father who rewarded success at school. To be honest, it was hard to get his attention and "approval" (i.e. love) in other ways. So I think I grew up thinking that I needed to get straight A's and be a high achiever to gain the "love" of my father. Totally false, but as a kid you don't know any better. If, into adulthood, you remain unaware of this root cause and underlying belief like I did, it can translate into things like this: let me get into an Ivy League college, let me go to law school, let me get the best six-figure lawyer job I can...all to prove I'm worthy...all to earn the "love" of my father. Perhaps you have had a similar experience.

When you spend a lifetime chasing "approval" you miss out on a lot. You deny yourself the beautiful experience of pursuing your own unique goals and the pathways that would lead to your happiness. Instead, you spend your energy chasing things other people want for you. This leads to feelings of frustration and unhappiness but, most of all, it leads to a feeling of emptiness. Have you ever strived for a goal only to achieve it and feel kind of empty? That's what I'm talking about here. If you're someone who strives and achieves, but never feels satisfied or inner peace or true happiness, you might be dealing with this issue. You might feel empty when you achieve a goal because it's really someone else's goal (for example, perhaps it is your parent's goal for you to get a high level position with a six-figure salary).

So once you're aware of this issue, where do you go from there? I believe the next step is writing down your own dreams and goals. This sounds a lot easier than it is. People with this issue often have a hard time verbalizing what they really want out of life because they've never really thought about it. They've spent their entire lives chasing dreams belonging to their parents or pursuing goals forced upon them by society and they've never even determined what they want. That was me! I saw a therapist for some time as a lawyer to talk through this issue (and others). Don't feel ashamed if you resonate with this paragraph - therapy has never been more accessible than it is right now. You can even talk to a therapist from the comfort of your own home these days. Remember, becoming aware of an issue is half the battle! So if this journal entry resonated with you, recognize that you're already half-way there.

If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. I hope you're able to learn something from my experience and also my mistakes!

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I'm in the process of creating a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. I only have a few weekly journal entries on the board right now, but I'm adding more on a weekly basis. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. In this week's journal entry, I'm talking about the importance of prioritizing purpose and connection in all aspects of life but especially when making career decisions. 

Let me tell you a story that goes something like this... I just got promoted, I'm making over 6 figures, I live in a beautiful condo downtown, I have great friends and family. I feel fortunate for what I have, but I am deeply, deeply unhappy. I cry most days, I have no energy after work to do anything but watch reality tv or HGTV, and the dread I feel on Sunday nights overwhelms me.

Does that resonate at all? You know, the "outside" seems pretty darn great but the inside is crying out about unmet needs? That was me. For a very, very, very long time. Eleven years to be exact. And I know there are a lot of you out there who have felt the same. 

Looking back, here's how I would boil it down - I was deeply unhappy because I was lacking connection and purpose in my life. And what made me even more unhappy was that everyone was telling me I should be happy because I "had it all"... and then this made me feel even worse about myself. And it left me drained and depleted.

We can strive for the next promotion, and the next promotion, and the next promotion and win them all, but at the end of the day when purpose and connection are missing, we will be unhappy with every win. We "think" that next thing is going to make us happy, and then it doesn't. So we strive for the next thing, and that doesn't make us happy either. If that pattern continues, it won't be long before a real sense of disillusionment sets in about the story we've been sold. You all know the "story" I'm referring to -- get into the best college, get into the best graduate school, get a high paying job, get married by 30, buy a house, get a dog, have a child, etc and at the end of that very long list, happiness awaits.   

We need to be smart enough to recognize that happiness is unique to each individual and not based on some superficial list of life achievements. And we need to be brave enough to admit what isn't working for us. We have to be brave enough to be radically honest, without judging ourselves and without minimizing our experience. 

I find that what usually is missing in this equation is purpose and connection. That's at the root of the unhappiness so many "successful" women experience. It doesn't matter how much money or friends you have - if you are lacking fundamental human connection and purpose, you will be deeply unhappy. And on the flip side, this is why people with "average" jobs and "average" salaries can be deeply happy. If they go home after work to a wonderful, big family and a supportive partner after working in a job that matches their purpose, they will experience deep joy and fulfillment and be much, much, much more happy than the person who appears to "have it all" per the story we've been sold growing up.

If this resonates with you, I strongly encourage you to start here -- evaluate your goals. If they consist of things like "get the next promotion" and "book that trip to Greece", I encourage you to take a deep look at what you're chasing in life. In my opinion, the biggest and largest and best goal any of us could ever strive for is deep, meaningful, and true connection and a job that fulfills our purpose. Get away from goals that center around words like promotion, job title, salary, and fancy trips and cars, and move towards goals that center around the things that are going to bring you joy, meaning, peace, connection, and fulfillment. And *most importantly* I can't tell you what those goals are because they are different for everyone. What makes me truly fulfilled is going to be drastically different from what makes you truly fulfilled. What brings me peace and joy is going to be different from you. We are all unique and special in our own ways and the "cookie cutter" approach to goals has been all wrong from the very start. We are all very different, and therefore we shouldn't all want the same things, but yet most of us are striving for that cookie cutter list I rattled off earlier (you know, the high paying job, husband, dog, house, kid, etc).

Warning: This is not easy. It sounds simple right? Draft a better list of goals with meaning? But it's terribly hard for so many women, including myself back in the day, because most of us have been programmed growing up to want that cookie cutter list and we have literally never thought about what we truly want. If you're say, 35, and this is the first time you've ever thought about what you truly want in life, it's going to be difficult. It's probably going to bring up some tears. It isn't an afternoon project - it might take months to figure out. It might even require the help of a coach or therapist. But it'll be worth every tear, every minute, every dollar you spend on it. I can say that from personal experience. I sought the help of a therapist in 2015 and, in 2017, I made the drastic choice to leave my job as a lawyer and start grace + hudson. It took me two years to work through some things and get really clear on what I want. Don't be surprised if it takes you that long too. That's important work and it can't be rushed.

At the end of the day, we all deserve to be deeply happy. And when you start to think of goals in a different way - when you start to think about YOUR unique happiness instead of the cookie cutter list of things that are "supposed" to make you happy, the idea of happiness seems a whole lot more attainable. And when we feel our goals are more attainable, we feel more empowered to reach them. In short, when you follow your unique purpose and the things that bring connection and fulfillment, you'll never be led astray. You'll always have the means of reaching them. It might take a long time, but you can get there. It was what you were put on this earth to do, and only you can stand in your own way. The other stuff is just obstacles to help you grow and help you become a better you. 

I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my own experiences. My wish is for everyone to know the feeling of doing work that brings them joy. It truly is an unbelievable gift to not dread Mondays and hope for Friday's fast arrival. If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I have a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. As I write this week's journal entry, grace + hudson is about to celebrate its 5th birthday. I opened the virtual doors to my grace + hudson e-commerce shop on June 14, 2017. Many new businesses never see the 5-year mark so I'm definitely experiencing some big, overwhelming feelings of gratitude and awe. Awe for just how much my life has changed in 5 short years. Gratitude that I get to show up every day to do something I love, in a space I adore, in a city that's the perfect match for me and my brand. I started grace + hudson in Chicago, with no plans to move to Charleston and no plans to ever open a brick + mortar shop. But the universe had some interesting things in store for me that I never could have planned! In tonight's journal I'm sharing the top 5 things I've learned in 5 years of business:

1. I had no idea how much personal growth work would be required to succeed.

When you start your own business, all sorts of stuff comes up for you. It's a challenging journey so that shouldn't have surprised me, but I was so focused on the nitty gritty details of things like my website, logo, and products that I totally neglected how much mindset work would be involved. Thankfully this came quickly to my attention and I've been a loyal student of mindset work ever since. The job is never done. It's like peeling back an onion. You master one area, and then lurking behind it is yet another. For example, you've probably heard of "imposture syndrome" and that's definitely come up for me at times. Imposture syndrome is having persistent feelings of self-doubt despite education, experience, and accomplishments... you know, the good ole "who am I to think I can succeed at this while everyone else toils and sweats in a 9-to-5 job?!" Feelings of lack (as opposed to abundance) and fears around money also came up BIG for me and required some real growth work. You see, if you believe you'll never make as much money selling jewelry as you did in your 9-to-5, that'll be true for you. But just the same, if you believe you can make just as much or even more selling jewelry, that'll be true for you too. It's amazing how much power our beliefs have on the experience of our reality. It truly is "all in our heads." Yet another thing that came up for me is control and perfectionism. Having practiced law for 11 years, it should come as no surprise that I'm a bit of a type A control freak at times, striving for perfection. Well, I had to learn how to let some of that go. I had to learn how to channel the good, positive side of that character trait into a more productive form. I had to let go of always having every single detail right every single time. Why? When you do that, you lose focus of the big picture. You spend time getting the margins and font on that email just right, instead of spending time on the important revenue-generating functions. There were countless other things I've learned and grown through - so many that I should probably write a book about them!

2. I understand the concept of "service" on a level I never understood before.

When you start a business always make service your top priority, not revenue. "How can I serve?" has taken me out of some whicked funks. Business ebbs and flows and, especially in the beginning, it's really easy to get tied up on that daily revenue number (and to freak out when it doesn't seem to be moving upwards). But the energy around that is complete lack, and it causes you to push and "hustle" in ways that never work. I learned early on that if I'm in a revenue slump, all I have to do is get back into the beautiful energy of "how can I serve?" and in no time, I see a turnaround. Why is that? I believe we are here on this earth to be truly helpful to others with the gifts we've been given, and it doesn't need to be fancy. You don't need to be volunteering in a homeless shelter to be of service. Sure, that's wonderful, but service is much, much broader than that. You merely have to extend your unique gifts to the world to be "of service." How can you help another? Maybe you are helping solve world hunger and that is your passion, or maybe it's much smaller than that. Maybe you are helping a bride desperate for a nice, classy gift for her bridesmaids that costs around $50 to show her appreciation for all the time, money, and effort they spent on her over the last few months. So, what problem can you solve? How can you be of service? How can you use what you were given to be useful in the world and provide a solution to someone else? Focus on service, not money, and you're much more likely to succeed in the long run. People can feel that.

3. Starting and building a new business is a marathon, not a sprint. In fact, it's a long, long, long marathon.

This one came as no surprise, but I wanted to mention it now that I'm rounding the bend on 5 years in business. A lot of online courses and teachers have popped up over the past few years and be very, very wary of the ones promising "quick ways to double your revenue" or "increase your social media following 10 times in 10 days." Nothing lasting and permanent is built that way. The people who succeed in business show up every day and make a little progress every day. I know that sounds simple but I know SO many business owners that started out around the same time as me but gave up years ago. They wanted instant results and, frankly, weren't willing to put in daily, consistent work for multiple years. "Sticking with it" has so much power and, I've learned, is something few people are willing to do.

4. When you create an authentic business, meaning one that is a true expression of your natural gifts and talents and experience, you will have few competitors.

I wrote about this one in detail last week so I won't expand on this a lot here. But when you create a business from your soul - you know, one that is a pure and true expression of your gifts, your talents, your personality, your experience, all wrapped up into one, you really distinguish yourself in the ever-increasing marketplace and have few direct, one-to-one competitors. For example, there are no other former lawyers designing dainty jewelry, specializing in weddings and writing weekly journals about career change and small business ownership every week. I'm the only one. And there's a business that each of YOU can create that is just as unique. Are you curious enough to find out what that is? It takes some digging and maybe even some coaching from a business coach, but it can be done. You can read more about this in last week's journal entry linked here.

5. Your friends will change when you make massive changes.

Maybe sad, maybe not, but the people in my circle right now are completely different than the ones that were present in my life 5 years ago. I attribute that to all the change I have gone through. I'm not the same person. And consequently, my friends have changed. This wasn't a terribly big surprise to me, but it might be to you. I can only think of maybe two lawyers I still keep in touch with, whereas five years ago almost all of my friends were lawyers like me. We're just on totally different paths now and share little in common. I find it's natural for people to want to spend time with people who can relate to them, and perhaps are experiencing similar things as them. So now I find myself surrounded by people with alternative careers like my boyfriend, or running their own business like the deli next door owned by a family from Massachusetts, or the wedding photographer who rents the office next to me, or the hair salon owner that set up shop in the space behind my store. These are my "co-workers" that I share daily chats with now. People come into our lives for a reason or a season, and if you accept that, this part will be a lot easier. And maybe you've already experienced this when, say, you got married and spent less time with your single friends or when you got pregnant and spent less time with your friends who don't yet have children. There will always be those few people that stick with you over a lifetime, but it's okay for the daily people we interact with to change every so often. It grows us.

I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my own experiences. My wish is for everyone to know the feeling of doing work that brings them joy. It truly is an unbelievable gift to not dread Mondays and hope for Friday's fast arrival. If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I have a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. In this week's journal entry, I am sharing the best piece of business advice I ever received. There is no shortage of business advice out there - both solicited and unsolicited. When you're just starting out, everyone wants to give you their two cents (and most of the advice you'll receive isn't even worth that much!). Hopefully though, you'll stumble upon a few nuggets of wisdom that just stick with you over the years.

For me personally, the most valuable nugget of wisdom that I received came from Marie Forleo. If you've spent any amount of time researching entrepreneurial advice online, you've probably come across her name. I took her B-School course online before I started grace + hudson and it was worth every single penny. I'll just say that the business I was going to start before I took B-School and after looked very different. There were many nuggets of wisdom in that course, but the one that stuck with me the most is Marie's advice about branding and marketing. The beginning of the course is really devoted to finding your niche in the marketplace. And the key is to niche down, niche down, niche down to a super specific market. Many entrepreneur coaches will tell you that - it's not unique to Marie. It sounds kind of counter-intuitive though because the tendency of an entrepreneurial novice is to want to "be everything to everyone." You know, if you try to sell something that appeals to everyone, you'll sell loads of it because your market is so big. Well, when you do that, you end up appealing to no one. Again, this point is not unique to Marie, it's just who I happened to learn it from. And that is the best nugget of wisdom I ever learned early on in my entrepreneurial journey because it's where I found my voice - it's where my brand became "dainty jewelry designed by a former lawyer pursuing a happier life." How many former lawyers do you know who sell dainty jewelry and share their journey about pursuing a happier life? I would bet I am the only one. And that's Marie's point. When you find your authentic voice and get really specific about what your brand is, you no longer have direct competition. There are no other former lawyers selling jewelry and writing weekly journal entries like me. And that's how you identify yourself in a sea of jewelry companies. Do you know how many people have come into my store and said, "Yeah, wait, aren't you the former lawyer who makes jewelry now?" It's my identifying, distinguishing mark. It's something that allows me to stand out from the crowd. And it would be pretty darn hard for another former lawyer to come along and do what I do, and do it better than me. It's just too specific. So in that way, you make yourself competition proof to some degree. 

So if you're looking to start a business someday soon, I highly encourage you to first educate yourself on marketing and branding especially as it relates to the social media space. And then second I would spend a LOT of time on finding your niche. When you think you've gotten specific, niche down again. And again. Find the way(s) in which you can distinguish your brand from every other in your industry. I promise you, this will be time well spent. And I promise you, if you don't do this, your business journey is going to feel like an uphill battle. There are just too many shoe stores, clothing stores, apparel brands, pet stores, etc, etc, etc  already out there - and if you plan on just doing what they're already doing, you're going to have a hard time. How is your brand different? That's the key. And don't stop there - you need to communicate that in your branding and marketing every single day. Heck, I've got a sign outside my store in Charleston that says "dainty jewelry designed in Charleston by a former lawyer pursuing a happier life." Do you know how many people come into my store because they read that? So many. And I know it because they tell me. They'll tell me they saw my sign outside and it brought them in. So that's what YOU have to find - what is going to bring that customer through your front door or your virtual door if you're solely an e-commerce business?  

I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my own experiences. My wish is for everyone to know the feeling of doing work that brings them joy. It truly is an unbelievable gift to not dread Mondays and hope for Friday's fast arrival. If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I have a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

 Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. If you have been following grace + hudson or my personal journey for a while you might already know that I am a pretty positive and optimistic person, usually able to see the good even in supposedly bad situations. I would say that I strive to live a peaceful and joyful life and, on most days, I truly feel that way. I wasn't always this way though and in this week's journal entry I want to share a little about that. It's important that you know that I wasn't always in a good place - in fact, things got pretty dark for a while. Maybe that's where you find yourself now and, if that's the case, maybe it'll give you some hope to know that I was there once too and reached the other side where a much better career (and life) was waiting for me.

I was an attorney for 11 years and I hated every second of it. Every. Second. I knew very early on - within a year or so - that I had made a really poor career decision. I mean, really poor. We're not just talking the typical, "I don't like my job." A legal career is obviously ridiculously demanding and very grueling. Long days and nights at work (and often weekends too), urgent emails all hours of the day, very demanding bosses, constant arguments. It's not a very "happy" career. By nature, I'm pretty optimistic, reserved, and gentle. But at work I was asked to be critical, argumentative, and aggressive. If someone had said to me before I went to law school, "Your entire life is going to feel like one huge argument," I definitely wouldn't have enrolled. But I didn't look at it that way. I was smart and capable of getting into a good graduate program and I just thought it's what I was "supposed to do." We're all pretty much taught to get the best, most stable, well-paying job we can, right? That's certainly the message I heard throughout high school and college and I bet you, too. No one ever sat me down and talked to me honestly about career choices. We pay thousands upon thousands of dollars to attend college and no one ever sits down with you to take an inventory of your natural skills, talents, and areas of interest to help you pick a career that might be fulfilling. Sounds crazy when you put it that way, doesn't it?

Anyways, I ended up in the legal profession and it was really out of alignment with who I am as a person. When that's the case, it's really hard to find any happiness at work. I felt so disconnected in so many ways, and I felt I was being asked to do things (like argue in court) that just really didn't fit my personality type in the least bit. I almost had to put on a fake facade to even make it through the days where I had to "turn it on" and be argumentative in court. Because of this internal struggle, I wasn't the gentle, optimistic Stacy you know today. Not at all. I had a pretty miserable outlook on life, a touch of depression, and little hope for a better future. Was my life just going to be about working long hours in a job I didn't like with hardly any personal life? Year after year went by and I could really sense this disconnection, this mis-alignment if you will, in my body. I was always sick. Nothing serious thank goodness, but I always had a stomach ache. I always had a cold. I often got 24 hour viruses. I even got mono in my 30's and I still to this day have no idea where I got it from. Looking back, I know that my immune system was weak because of the stress. This wasn't just the natural stress of being in a demanding profession - this was also the stress of being in a career that felt really contrary to who I am. And that stuff builds up. I look back at pictures of myself from ten years ago when I was a young attorney and I look older back then than I do today. It's a little scary. I hate to think about what my body would feel like five, ten, twenty years from now if I had stayed in the legal profession. Stress is real and it has a real impact in terms of your immune system, cancer, and countless other health issues. Your body simply can't operate in that state for your entire life without real impact. 

So fast forward to today, where I've found a career path I love. I'm pleased to report that not only am I really happy at work, but I am SO much healthier. I don't get constant stomach aches, I don't find myself sick with colds or minor ailments all the time, and I feel healthier at age 42 than I did at 32. So what's my point in sharing all of this? If you can identify with this story - and again, we're not just talking "I hate my job," we're talking a true misalignment - then I want to be honest with you that it doesn't get better. It doesn't. I practiced law for 11 years even though I knew it was wrong for me in year one. I tried different jobs in different cities and nothing worked. I knew switching law firms wasn't the solution. I knew I had to leave entirely. But hey, I can sit here today and confidently say that I tried a few different jobs in the legal profession before I gave up on it. It makes me feel more confident in my decision to leave. If you know you're in the wrong career, trust that. Sure, try a few different things to confirm your decision, but don't be surprised when they don't work out.

And the other message I would leave you with today is this: it gets better. You deserve better and better is out there. You just have to have the courage to make a change. Think of it like a poor romantic relationship. We've all experienced them in life at one point or another, right? Whether it was in high school or later in life, chances are you've heard the phrase, "You deserve better." And the same is true here. If you find yourself in a real misalignment, if you find yourself in a career that you know without a shadow of a doubt is never going to bring you fulfillment, you deserve better. I don't care how much the job pays you, it is not worth it. I can say this because I was earning well into the six figures and I can tell you without a doubt that the money was not worth it. It's not worth poor health. It's not worth the mental struggle of constantly having to be someone or something you're not, like me trying to be aggressive and argumentative when a court battle required it. It is not worth it. And trust me, you CAN find a new path. Maybe you'll have to "pay your dues" for a few years like me, and sacrifice a bit like I did during those first initial years of grace + hudson, but then you get established in your new career, start to earn more money, and you find yourself in the beautiful position of having career fulfillment AND stable finances. It IS possible. I am a living example of it.  

I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my own experiences. My wish is for everyone to know the feeling of doing work that brings them joy. It truly is an unbelievable gift to not dread Mondays and hope for Friday's fast arrival. If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I'm in the process of creating a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. In this week's journal entry, I am encouraging you to be motivated by authenticity and growth - not money - as you decide upon your career or ponder a career change.

I think the root cause of the rampant career dissatisfaction in our country is that we're taught to be motivated by money. Ask people why they're working at a job they don't like and I guarantee you that they'll all give you an answer relating to money: "I can't afford to quit" or "I can't make this kind of money elsewhere" or "I'll never make money doing what I love." We all know that "money doesn't buy happiness" but many of us make decisions based on money and then wonder why we aren't happy. This is why my biggest piece of advice for you is this: be driven not by money, but by what will grow and evolve you into a better version of yourself.

I can already hear you saying, "Yeah, that's a nice idea, but I've got bills to pay." Paying bills is important. Obviously. But when did financial security become the only goal that matters? It's like, we think if we have financial security, all of a sudden we'll be happy and our life will be perfect. Spoiler alert: that's not true. I had financial security in my job as a lawyer and I was a hot mess. You wouldn't even recognize "old Stacy" as I like to call her. Sure, you can wear nice clothes, drive a nice car, buy a nice house, but if you aren't happy, those things don't make you happy either. So I'm telling you - if the only thing that's driving your career decisions is money, you are in for a big disappointment over the course of your life. Even if you make all the money and get all the promotions, you are going to feel pretty empty at the finish line. And then what?

My father was a real life example of this. He worked hard, saved religiously in a 401(k), budgeted his finances like a pro, bought us a large family house and worked on his beautifully manicured front lawn so that the "outside" picture of his life was nearly perfect. But he was quite unhappy on the inside. And I think it was a big disappointment for him when he "checked off" all the things on the checklist of life, and happiness wasn't waiting for him at the end. I think he strived to "do all the things" and achieve and be perfect, hoping that inner peace and joy would be waiting at the end. Not so. Life isn't about how much money you make, your job title, and how big your house is. Life is much deeper than that. My dad passed away fairly young - he had just turned 65 - and it was a glorious experience to see him soften at the end of his life while he fought a short 10-month battle with cancer. He learned during that time that friendships, your children, quality time, and laughter are priceless and really make up a life. Not the type of house you live in or how green your lawn is each summer. He spent a lot of time obsessing over the "outside" details of life, and not enough on what mattered.

Listen, I don't deny that money has to be a factor in the career decisions you make. But let it be just that: one single factor in the overall decision-making process. Let me encourage you to be driven less by money and more by what is going to grow you and evolve you into the next highest version of yourself. What were you put here on this earth to accomplish? What gifts do you have to share? What do you feel called to do? When you line up with those things and start living YOUR authentic purpose, life has an entirely different flavor. Your life becomes about serving others with the unique gifts that only you have. And when you're in alignment with that, life just flows. I can happily say I live in this space now, after 11 long miserable years as an attorney. I was put on this earth to be the former lawyer turned jewelry maker pursuing a happier life. I was meant to share my gift of jewelry design and to show people that you can make a massive career change that benefits you in ways you never could have imagined. What were YOU meant to do here? What gifts or message or story does your life tell?   

Let me leave you with this idea. It's great if the career path you're on will lead to both more money and personal growth. But when you're given a choice between the two, choose growth. Think of it as a long-term investment. When you become a better version of yourself, the money follows. It won't be immediate, but if you stick with it, it comes. It really, really does. And earning money from something you enjoy even feels a lot better than money earned from doing something you don't particularly like. It's temporary sacrifice for long-term gain.

I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my own experiences. My wish is for everyone to know the feeling of doing work that brings them joy. It truly is an unbelievable gift to not dread Mondays and hope for Friday's fast arrival. If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I'm in the process of creating a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I am excited to be back with new journal entries for 2022. If you're new to grace + hudson, I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. It's been quite a journey! And I know a lot of you would love to leave your 9-to-5 behind and pursue your own business doing something you love. In this week's journal entry, I am writing about opening your mind to the possibility that you CAN do work you love.

If you take a quick look around, it's not hard to see why most people feel an unsatisfying 9-to-5 job is the only option. It's all over our culture - from "I hate Mondays" to "TGIF" - we are taught to hate 5 days of the week and live for 2 of them. In school, we are pushed to get a "stable" corporate job at a reputable company. We are taught to "think practically" and stifle our dreams. Did anyone in your schooling ever sit down with you to evaluate your God-given gifts and talents? Think about it. We all have really special talents - some people have one big one, some people have a few smaller ones. Some people are gifted writers. Some, singers. Some people are absolutely fascinated by the human body and want to pursue medicine and healing. Some are intrigued by construction work and want to pursue a trade. I don't know about you, but I never - not once - had an adult sit down with me during my formative years to evaluate how my talents, gifts, and special skills could be parlayed into a career.

This is one of the reasons it is so hard to leave a "stable" 9-to-5 and pursue a dream. To most, it sounds foolish given the programming we endured for so many years about work. Still to this day, if I had a dime for every person who said, "Wow you left a stable job as a lawyer to make jewelry?!" I would be rich. They'll even walk into my store in Charleston and say that - with evidence right before their very eyes that my dream has come into fruition. That's the programming we were brought up with. And some people are very unaware of it.

If you want to start your own business one day or pursue a different career than the one you find yourself in, you will have to overcome this programming. You will need to erase it and replace it. That sounds daunting, doesn't it? I mean, the TGIF culture is all around us - from the TV shows we watch to the way we sign off emails with "Have a great weekend" - heck, there's even a national restaurant chain named TGIF's. So where do you begin? It's a process, not something that happens overnight. I would suggest that you begin by writing down this phrase and repeating it every single morning on your way to work and every single night as you fall asleep. I would also recommend repeating it every time you feel negative feelings about your current work creep up. Maybe put this phrase on an index card and carry it with you in your wallet or copy and paste it into the notepad on your phone so that it's always available to you. Here it goes:

It is possible to do work I love. I don't need to hate my job and live for the weekends. I can earn money using the talents and gifts and skills I was born with, and have fun along the way. It is possible to love my job and my work.

If that phrase sounds like a load of crap to you, well my friend you have a lot of work to do. Your programming runs deep. In addition to repeating this phrase as much as possible, I would recommend that you look for real life examples of people doing work they love. Maybe you have a relative or friend you can point to. Or you can point to someone famous - I mean, look at Betty White. She did work she loved until the day she died. Look at singer Tony Bennett - he performed with Lady Gaga last year at the age of about 95 years old. It's true, when you do work you love, you never "work" (as you currently understand that term) a day in your life. And the idea of "retirement" also gets turned on its head (but that's a discussion for another day). And please, please, please, look at me as an example. I am no different than you. If I can do it, you can do it. It takes WORK. It will be HARD. But it is so, so possible. There is no instant gratification here. Nothing worth having gets handed to you on a silver platter. If you stick with it, you can change the way you perceive work.

When you change your perceptions around work, that's when things really start to shift. You start to become a magnet for work that feels good, because that's where your mindset is. Work is supposed to feel good. Don't get me wrong, every day is not a walk in the park in a fantasy land. But overall the way you spend 40+ hours per week should be satisfying on a number of levels. You should feel like you're contributing your gifts and talents to the world. You should feel like you're learning and growing as a person. You should feel like you're earning a living by contributing what you have to offer. It's a beautiful exchange when you think about it: to give your gifts and get currency in return to pay for your life's expenses. I love the word "currency" instead of money because it conveys the energy behind it.

And several years, after things have changed for you, you'll look back and you'll be able to see exactly why you attracted those jobs you hated. I see it now, with myself. I know exactly why I was attracted to being a lawyer, and why I allowed myself to remain there for so long even though I hated it. In short, I was a straight A's at school perfectionist who went to an Ivy League college and a top 25 law school and got all of my internal worth and self-esteem from being validated at school and work. That's where I excelled. So as I kept excelling and excelling and excelling at school and work, I felt "better" about myself. But it was really a false sense of self-esteem I was building that eventually came crashing down but that's a journal entry for another day. And then, when I got into the legal profession, some unhealthy personality traits I developed as a child living with a bipolar father served me extraordinarily well in my profession. For example, when you're a child living with a bipolar parent who is not managing his or her disorder, all of your effort goes into "not making dad or mom upset." And by default, you learn that your needs and wants don't matter. Of course, as a child you don't understand that you aren't the one making dad or mom upset. You don't understand its their disorder. Well, fast forward to the legal profession where you are asked to work all hours of the day and all days of the week, and bend over backwards for your clients. Your needs don't matter. Your clients always come first, no matter what. I can remember a wedding I missed because of work. I can remember missing out on seeing my grandmother before she passed because I had a legal brief due in court the next day. Awful. Awful. Awful. This is not acceptable. But of course at the time, my clients' needs were more important than my own no matter what the price tag and that made me a great lawyer. Ironic, isn't it? As you can imagine, there were some deep-seated issues that needed to be healed and I used the help of a therapist. Your journey may be similar. When people used to ask me at the beginning of my business ownership journey - are you scared you'll have to go back to being a lawyer someday?  My answer has always been a resounding "no." You know why? I have healed the junk that made me a match for that job. That situation is no longer acceptable to me, for various reasons. I am now a match for doing work I love, having personal freedom to prioritize the events that matter to me, having boundaries at work, and earning a living by offering my gifts and talents to the world.

So, if you're in a job or career you don't particularly like right now, I hope that you too will no longer be a match for it someday soon. With some hard work and some time, it's guaranteed. The choice is yours.

If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my business journey and my experiences!

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I created a Weekly Journal board so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,

Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. In this week's journal entry, I'm sharing the one thing I would invest in if I were launching a new business right now. A lot of you are aspiring business owners, and maybe you've even started to work on your business website! If so, you might be overwhelmed at all there is to do and what it costs. Which things are worth the money? Which things can you cut corners on? What do you really need now, and what can wait? Looking back, here's the one thing I would prioritize that I don't see a lot of entrepreneurs prioritizing these days.

I've been in the entrepreneur world for about 5 years now and I've met a lot of business owners during that time. Both online and in real life. When you're just starting out, you tend to do a lot of networking! I also did a lot of pop up shops before I had the pleasure of opening my own brick and mortar store, and I met a lot of other business owners at those pop ups. And these days you exchange Instagram handles more than you exchange business cards, right? So I've seen a lot of social media accounts and websites from small business owners. And there's one one thing I noticed a lot. And there's one thing new business owners complain about a lot. And that's professional photography and the cost of it.

If there's one thing I can persuade you to invest in, it would be professional photography. And listen, you don't need to go for the gold and hire someone expensive. No, no. Not necessary. You can upgrade to better photography as your business grows and makes more revenue (in fact, I've just hired a new more experienced photographer to upgrade my website photos in 2022!). But starting out, I highly, highly, highly suggest you get yourself some professional photos. If you have a website (well, you better! That goes without saying!) it needs to look professional and polished. If you're selling online, people cannot touch and see the product for themselves. You have to convey how beautiful and amazing it is in photos. That can't be done with crappy iPhone photos taken by someone who doesn't know how to edit photos. And if you're selling services (such as coaching or consulting) you are the product. So you need to look polish and trustworthy and professional in your photos, or potential clients are going to have a hard time trusting you with their dollars. Bottom line - your photos are your language. It's how you communicate with people. Most people don't read words these days. For real! For example, Instagram captions are kind of a dead thing, right? If you don't capture their attention with a photo, they definitely aren't going to read the words under it. Heck, even if they like the photo, they still might not read the words. It's all about instant impact with visuals.

Despite this, so many business owners complain about hiring a professional and claim they don't have the money. Well, I'm sorry to break this obvious news to you, but if YOU won't invest in your business, don't expect others to! Right? Right. If you truly are unable to invest in some photos, see if you can hire a photography major from a nearby college. These students often have to build up a portfolio, so they might work for a very low rate or entirely free. Think outside the box! You might even be able to barter - if you sell jewelry and you need jewelry photos, perhaps you can agree to give the photographer 5 free pieces if she does this work for you. Or maybe you have a friend who is really, really good with iPhone photos. There are so many editing apps out there to make photos look polished and professional and maybe you have a friend or two who can navigate those. Get creative! After all, coming up with creative solutions to problems is one major job of an entrepreneur.  

So when you're making your budget for your new business, leave some room for professional photos. You won't regret it! You have one opportunity to grab a stranger's attention. 

I hope you're able to learn something valuable from my own business journey and experiences! If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I'm in the process of creating a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy

Welcome to another edition of my Weekly Journal! I use this space to share about my journey from lawyer to jewelry business owner. This is part four in a series where I'm sharing what it's really like to be a small business owner and if that path is right for you. So many of you want to start your own business someday and it's important that you have a realistic picture of what that entails. Today we're talking a little about the criticism you're bound to receive from some family and friends as you begin your business ownership journey. 

For me, the nuts and bolts of starting a business were relatively easy compared to constantly battling this idea that I was somehow wrong for wanting to follow my heart and create a good life for myself that has meaning, depth, and joy. Many of my friends, co-workers, and family members questioned me and talked down to me in the beginning. And if some of the closest people in your life don't believe in you, how are you supposed to believe in you? It can certainly throw you for a loop.

I can still remember all the judgments I endured when I quit my lawyer job. The comments I still remember are:

• You really think you can make enough money selling jewelry?
• How are you going to pay for your living expenses?
• You're just going to waste your law degree like that?
• Have you ever thought about trying a different field of law instead? (Oh my gosh, this was my pet peeve. You really think I haven't thoroughly examined this idea!?)
• What business experience do you have to run your own business? (Said in a very derogatory tone)
• So, like, when are you going to go back to being a lawyer? (Again, said in a very derogatory tone)

When you start your business, you are going to receive similar comments. Trust me. So how do you navigate through them without losing your confidence? Well, at the end of the day, always remember these comments say more about the person making them than they do about you. That's it. That's the key. Remember that these comments are coming from people who have bought the "traditional life path" model hook, line, and sinker. You know how it goes - work at a job you don't particularly like, wish for the weekends, save in a 401(k), and hope to really start "living" at age 65 when you retire. These types of people get really uncomfortable when they see someone challenging that traditional path. You know why? Because they have to face the possibility that maybe there is another way. And, boy oh boy, these types of people don't like to be wrong about the way they've approached things. Trust me, I've met lots and lots of them in the legal profession. These people tend to think that everyone should be on the straight and narrow path and anyone who veers outside of that is crazy, naive, weird, strange, etc. Don't let them deter you. Don't let them steer you off course. Remember that you have a bigger life vision than them, that's all. And you'll be the one living the good life in a few years, while they stay trapped until retirement. 

After a couple years, when your business has become more stable, they'll be the ones asking you for advice! Trust me. I've experienced this too. It's great fun for me to talk to the people who previously judged me! Some of them can hardly believe that I never went back to law. And they become so curious as to how you did it. To say the least, it's pretty gratifying to say "I told you so" (in my mind and never out loud of course!)

I hope this real talk is helpful. I'll be back next week with the fifth and final installment in this series. It's so important to get clear on this stuff before you invest a lot of time and money into your business idea. 

If you'd like my Weekly Journal sent straight to your inbox every week, click here to subscribe. 

P.S. Are you on Pinterest? I'm in the process of creating a Weekly Journal board on Pinterest so you can easily navigate all of my journal entries. You can view and follow the board by clicking here. I've written so much about quitting my lawyer job to start g+h over the past couple years and I want to make it easier for you to access and read the entries that resonate most!

xoxo,
Stacy